Nectar of the gods

I have two or three Diet Cokes per day, which represents cutting back from five not long ago. It also represents switching from Diet Pepsi, which I preferred until they changed the recipe to remove aspartame for some silly reasons about it causing cancer and depression and whatnot. Sales dropped bigly because the new formula tasted like Tab. With customers all but marching on PepsiCo headquarters (“We want cancer! We want depression!”), the company yielded and reintroduced what’s now called Classic Sweetener Blend Diet Pepsi — Pepsi Max, by the way, is now Pepsi Zero Sugar, they’re just renaming and tinkering maniacs while Coke sails serenely on — so now I have two beverage choices.

Of course, no one believes any more that drinking diet soda will actually help you lose weight. That was decades ago, when Diet Rite was running commercials with the jingle of the day:

What have you got to lose?
What have you got to lose?
Maybe you’ve got an inch, a pinch, a flinch or a pound or two
Diet Rite’s the number one, got the taste that’s cola true
What have you got to lose?

The taste of Fresca, meanwhile, was a blizzard.

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