Lullaby and good night

I have never needed one (quite the opposite), but if you’re trying to sell a sleeping aid, you need a soothing voice. That’s why our jingle of the day is the soporific, calming, crooning couplet that was all over TV in the ’60s and ’70s:

Take Sominex tonight and sleep,
Safe and restful sleep, sleep, sleep …

I actually preferred the bouncier, more upbeat line of a rival product,

Nytol will help you get your Z’s!

–during which the two tablets posed in front of the bottle would do a quarter-turn, so the N’s etched into the pills would turn to Z’s.

My problem, as I said, is not falling asleep but waking up, my attitude toward which matches the matchless Nero Wolfe’s sidekick Archie Goodwin’s:

I would appreciate it if they would call a halt on all their devoted efforts to find a way to abolish war or eliminate disease or run trains with atoms or extend the span of human life to a couple of centuries, and everybody concentrate for a while on how to wake me up in the morning without my resenting it. It may be that a bevy of beautiful maidens in pure silk yellow very sheer gowns, barefooted, singing ‘Oh, What a Beautiful Morning’ and scattering rose petals over me would do the trick, but I’d have to try it.

To hell with them (party before country division)

Stunning new numbers from the Quinnipiac poll today, with Donald Trump plunging to a new low. American voters disapprove 61 to 33 percent of the job he is doing; say 54 to 26 percent that they are embarrassed to have him as president; say 57 to 40 percent that they believe he is abusing the powers of his office and 60 to 36 percent that he believes himself above the law.

71 percent say Trump is not levelheaded; 62 percent that he is not honest; 59 percent that he does not care about average Americans; 63 percent that he does not share their values.

By 58 to 37 percent, American voters believe Trump “has attempted to derail or obstruct the investigation into the Russian interference in the 2016 election,” something 63 percent believe did occur.

So to hell with whom? Those scum Republicans, who approve of his performance 76 to 17 percent, and who–61 to 30 percent–don’t believe that the Russian government interfered in our elections in 2016. If Ebola had an (R) after it, they would vote for Ebola.